Posts filed under ‘Thinking’
I woke up today feeling more blue than usual. There is a huge sadness hovering over me and I just don’t feel right. It almost feels as though I am carrying other peoples sadness on top of my own, but there is no one else around me except for my kids – and they aren’t sad.
I have had this happen to me before. It’s a heavy, hollow feeling in my chest, accompanied by a sharp stab to the heart at the mere thought of whatever is causing the sadness. My body feels as though someone is literally riding on my shoulders, trying to pull my soul out of the top of my head to get my attention. It’s similar to the feeling you get when you are going up in an elevator really, really fast, only there is actually a presence there with you.
One would think that I am too far from my family right now (who live in B.C.) be feeling their pain and grief as strongly as I am, if that is even what I am feeling. If it is, I can only imagine what my body will be like when I see them in person.
I am also experiencing something else I haven’t had in a very long time. These last few days, almost every time I close my eyes, I see my Uncle’s face. I see him as he used to look, not as I saw him last. He is smiling and happy, which is obviously good, but it’s throwing me for a bit of a loop. Is it just my subconscious remembering him or IS it him letting me know he’s okay? I have had many people in my life pass away, but none that have done this to me before – to this extent. Either way, I am welcoming it with open arms. If he is actually coming to me and has something to say, I want to hear him and be able to pass the message along.
Only, I don’t think it’s just my Uncle. I feel more than one spirit surrounding me.
I am not too sure right now how to react to the feeling I have, so I will just wait and see where the day takes me. It’s going to be another hot day (+30℃) and I know that’s not going to help lift my spirits any, especially with having to get things ready to head out of town on Saturday.
I will see if some music will help take my mind of this heaviness.
I am bluer than blue.
Gee, for someone who isn’t religious, I sure like to talk about it, huh?
I am a very open minded person and I do not judge when it comes to things like this. I, for one am not religious and in a few days you will become more familiar as to why that is.
I am just curious and want to ask others regardless of religions or beliefs, what do you believe in and why?
They say Cheese Whiz adds personality. Well, I’ve been consuming the stuff for years and NOTHING!
I want my money back! I want compensation for all the years of believing a lie!
I need a hug!
I wish it were raining right now so I can go outside and jump barefoot in the puddles.
How does one go about appreciating something when there are flaws due to pure laziness attached? Is it just me, or is that actually hard to do with a smile on your face?
For example, emptying the garbage and taking it out. One empties the garbage but leaves a path of destruction behind for me to clean up. Is that really necessary? Do I really look like I have nothing else better to do during the day?
Things get moved, but not put back. Food boxes opened, but never closed again. By the way, all of these magically happen in the middle of the night by a bunch of gnomes. I’m not kidding, they do! (I have pictures)
Oh Wow, how the list can go on.
What mainly gets me is the half-assed attempts at ‘helping’. Washing dishes also includes wiping the counters when you’re done instead of leaving puddles all over the place. It also helps to spread the dish towel out to dry properly, not clump it in the corner somewhere for me to find three days later smelling like a sweaty gym sock. When you make yourself something to eat, wipe the crumbs up off the counter instead of trying to blame it on the cat. It’s been a very long time since she’s jumped up on the counter and made a peanut butter and jam sandwich without cleaning up after herself.
Seriously though, how hard is it to tidy up after yourself? You don’t need a special degree to make this happen. I mean have all those lessons in elementary school to tidy up after yourself just evaporate from the brain? I am far from a neat freak. I like my home to look lived in, but I also like it clean.
I don’t think some people get that a Stay-At-Home-Parent gets just as frustrated when their workspace is tampered with by someone. Would those in the work place enjoy a co-worker coming over to their area, take something, make a mess and just simply walk away? I don’t think so. It’s not like we SAHP’s don’t work hard to keep things clean and organized. We have a job to do as well. We may not get paid money for our job, but it’s hard and stressful all the same. Not just that, but we don’t get to leave our ‘work’ at work. Our work IS our home. We don’t have assigned coffee and lunch breaks or days off for that matter.
So, if I am to cut you some slack after your hard day at work and not throw the kids at you while I run to another room to yank out the remaining three hairs from my head, you can cut me some as well by cleaning up after yourself.
I think that’s fair, don’t you?
Mother Nature is teasing me.
It was supposed to be +2℃ and sunny. It is not. It is overcast (which I don’t mind) and windy causing all the snow to be tossed about from tree to tree. Ugh.
I was hoping to be able to have my windows open and enjoy a nice breeze while I drink my coffee in my big comfy chair, but no, that will have to wait until tomorrow. It’s supposed to be something along the lines of +6℃ tomorrow, but I’m not holding my breath for that one.
I guess I will spend this afternoon cleaning house and making crafts.