It’s Only Time Now
I posted a while back about my Uncle dying of cancer. Well, it turns out that it’s not stomach cancer after all, but pancreatic. Apparently and unknown to him, he’s had this for a few years, but it just recently caused issues for him to have it looked into.
He was feeling well enough to make the sad trip to see his family for what probably will be the last time.
It was bittersweet.
When talking to my cousin, he told me the last few weeks were very emotional for them. They spent it crying, sorting out the sales of all their property and belongings, finding my Aunt a place to live and crying some more. He also told me that he is finally able to talk about it now as they went through most of the emotional stuff already, but as he said it his bottom lip quivered and all I could do was hug him.
I’m worried about my Baba with all this. Her memory has been fading quite a bit lately and she’s having a hard time remembering people. When she was told the news a few weeks back, she was sad but then the very next day she questioned the news and had to be reminded. Maybe it’s a good thing she doesn’t remember everything like she used to? However, how many times is she going to have to relive the knowledge and pain of her loss when she brings him up wondering where he is and people will have to tell her over and over again? I’m hoping that won’t be the case.
My Aunt is in some pretty rough shape too. Not only is she having to deal with the fact that her Husband of 41 years is dying, but when they were here visiting, her mother suffered a stroke back in B.C. Her mother is 87, lives alone and is one stubborn lady. She was found a day and a half later, laying on the floor. I am unsure as to whether or not she was able to contact someone when this happened (I don’t know the severity of her stroke) but she is known to refuse help. So she is now in the hospital from her stroke and also has a touch of pneumonia. Chances are when/if she is released from the hospital, she will be forced to live in a seniors building which has medical care and I can tell you this…She will HATE it.
My Aunt told me that they will be spending as much time as they can relaxing (or trying to) since the next little while will be about getting her moved into her new place. She already looks so lost. Thankfully, they are able to deal with what they need to now so that it isn’t something they have to worry about later on. I have to agree with my cousin. It certainly takes one strong person to deal with all of these arrangements, basically say good bye to his mother and family and make sure no one is left with the burden of his death.
What tugged on my heart strings the most was looking at my Uncle. It was just so wrong to see him so tired. I don’t think I have ever seen him tired. He was always busy, full of life and telling funny stories. Now he is sad, scared and fragile. When he was saying his goodbye’s to his siblings, I just stood there watching tears fall and the sadness pour out of everyone.
I was glad I got to see him and tell him that I love him.
He’s a fighter. I just hope he will come out victorious!