Archive for December, 2007

Something To Do Today

Make up a new word, use it for everything and see if anyone catches on.


December 31, 2007 at 11:09 pm Leave a comment

Happy New Year!!!

I just wanted to wish everyone a Safe & Wonderful New Year.  Hope 2008 brings you everything you hope for!


December 31, 2007 at 2:51 am 3 comments

Me, Myself & I

Well, it’s 2:14 am…Do you care where your parents are?

I am here, you are there and no one loves me enough to wanna make friends. Which, by the way is fine with me…I wouldn’t wanna be my friend either, but I am.

I have, what some might relate to as Multiple Personality Disorder…Or so I’ve been told. No doctor has ever diagnosed me with this, but I’m a Gemini!!! I tend to be a tad bit on the weird side. I can’t function normally on my good days, but then again, what the hell IS this thing called NORMAL anyway? Who the hell invented that word and the meaning behind it?

Something to add to my TO DO list. I have a bad habit of making these TO DO lists and going nowhere with them. I think my subconscious makes me make them to feel guilty about being lazy.

I also come with these weird habits and I make funny noises/sing when I concentrate on stuff. I tend to babble and stray off topic. I shout out odd things too…just because. I also talk to myself. Did you know that talking to yourself can be kinda fun? You know that you will always get an answer, you won’t argue with yourself and you will always be on your side? It’s fabulous…Talk about a real pal!!! You may be hard on yourself, but you know it’s for your own good. Everyone is their own worst critic. I don’t think I would have it any other way. Although a little love every now and then would be nice too…I never buy myself flowers anymore.

I just caught a whiff of freshly cleaned monkey…hmmmm.




Pssssst…what DOES freshly cleaned monkey smell like anyway?


December 30, 2007 at 1:38 am 13 comments


I wonder what it would be like to actually run away with the circus?

December 29, 2007 at 6:57 pm 4 comments

Right, Wrong Or Understandable. You Decide.

Out of curiosity, how many of you out there would start dating someone barely a month after your spouse died suddenly?  Now, I don’t know the full story to all this and probably never will. All of this information was gathered from both of their personal blogs, and as we all know, not everything that is personal is mentioned to the public.  All I know is they were married for 3 years, trying to have kids and they were in the middle of building a new home. There wasn’t any mention of troubles in the marriage, however, she was known to have bouts of depression (for whatever reason).

Rumor has it she committed suicide. When he announced the news of her death, he never mentioned how she died or even gave a hint. I found out how through a group blog she was a part of.  He hasn’t done a whole lot of talking about her since she passed either and it seems his friends are supporting the whole dating thing.  I also read on his blog that he started crushing on New Girl a month before his wife died and shortly after her death, told his friends that he would like to go on a date with New Girl.  The date happened a month after his wife’s death.  New Girl also knew his wife and blogged a little about her death.

Now, I am a tad confused not knowing the whole story, but personally I think dating someone that soon after is a little odd. It’s not like this was just a break-up, a divorce or something expected. Even if it was expected, give yourself some time to heal and deal with what happened. Now, I know there is the whole “fall down, get back up” thing, or all the other cliches that come with tragedy, but please. Whatever happened to the respect aspect of it all? I’m not saying that he shouldn’t date period, just give yourself a few months. Don’t fall under the pressure of rejoining the ‘real world’ just because everyone else sick of seeing you grieve. Believe me, I was there and it sucked. Needless to say, those people aren’t your friends if they can’t be bothered to hold you up for once and for however long you need.

I could go on for a while about this one, but will save it for another time.Now, I am trying to not pass judgment because I really don’t know what family life was like and what happened behind closed doors. It’s just that something doesn’t sit right with me.  Maybe her suicide was a weight lifted off his shoulders?  Maybe her depression was difficult to live with?

The people in her group made her sound like she was a great friend, giving, caring, super talented, very much loved and in love.

I am interested in hearing what the rest of you think. If you’ve been through something similar, what did you do? I won’t even ask ‘what would you do’ because in all fairness, it’s not something that can be answered until it happens. You can say one thing now and have it be something completely different once that time comes.

We will be approaching the second anniversary of her Death in February and not long after that, Boy and New Girl will be married.

December 29, 2007 at 1:31 am 3 comments


It’s 4:00 a.m. and surprise, surprise. I can’t sleep.

Insomnia bites.



*EDIT*  It’s 4:30 a.m. and I am now forcing myself to go to bed.  Let’s see if I can bore myself to sleep with one of those lame infomercials about wax. 

December 28, 2007 at 3:55 am 6 comments

Somewhere In My Imagination

Do you ever go into that fun place of your imagination where after you read a book or watch a movie, you wish you were that character or something similar?  I get that way.  It’s not that I’m all “into” the book/movie, but that I really wish I were able to become something different sometimes and the books/movies help me to get there.

How cool would it be to become a Vampire.  To be mysterious. Hidden. Supernatural.  Immortal.  I know the life of a Vampire would be lonely, but at times I can almost relate.  Besides, I don’t mind being alone.  There are days where I crave that.

Superheroes would be cool too.  To be able to fly and be invincible.  How much fun would that be?  All the super powers they have, makes one wonder which would be the coolest to possess. Then there is Harry Potter.  Way too much fun!

I have also dreamt of living back in the medieval/middle ages, where my home would be a beautiful castle looking over the country side.  Sometimes I think it would be neat to live like they did in Little House On The Prairie.  Old wood stoves and lanterns lighting the log cabins.  

It brings peace to my mind sometimes to do that very thing here at home.  Shut off all things electrical, light candles and sit there in the dimly lit room.  It inspires me to draw, which is something I haven’t done in forever but since having kids it’s been hard to find the time to zone out the rest of the world and go to my happy place without constant interruptions.

I have always told myself that if I weren’t to get married or have kids, I would move to some small town, buy some dilapidated house that has been abandoned for years and move on in.  I would rarely come out of the house unless its dark out, leaving the neighbors to think that I was a witch or something.  For shits and giggles I would go up into the attic and turn on a strobe light to make the neighbors think something dark and sinister was going on.

Halloween would be the best as I would be the talk of the town as the kids would be daring each other to come to the door, thinking that I would eat them if they stepped foot on my property.  I would have the best time rigging the house to do weird things and make people see things that would be ‘unexplained’.  If there were a brave child to show their face at my door, I would answer dressed in a black dress wearing a black veil covering my face and hand them their candy.

Ah, to be something or someone else for a while would be nice, don’t you agree?  Maybe I should have taken up acting.  However, since acting is pretty much out of the question (no formal education and I highly doubt I’d pass as a natural), maybe I can escape through writing.

To have a book of my very own would be a great accomplishment.  Someday.

December 27, 2007 at 5:01 pm 5 comments

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